Blogtanamo Bayblog

AUSTIN TO PDX

2011-05-14T15:17:00.000-07:00

SO this post obviously took forever. We DID get home. But i'm a retard and didn't update. Its cuz i hate lameass blogger so much but whatevz. SO ANYWAY here is me updating. If anyone wants to point me in the direction of somethinig better to use than blogger (not tumblr either assholes) then I'm all ears. CUz this shit is pukey.

MORE UPDATES COME TOO. Just don't have internet at the house, so I've gotta buy shit in a coffee shop in order to do anything useful.

Jason laid the world gnarliest fart. Its the fart of the century. On the cover of Life magazine.Border patrol got us again. Jasons fart must have been made of heroin.

Weird shop we went into in rural AZ

LAGUNA BEACH:

Riverside. Santanas.

Me and Patsy got tattoos.

AUSTIN SXSW FUKIN

2011-03-17T21:08:00.001-07:00

played washers? i think thats what it was called. i didn't play but the boys crushed it.
dont mess with texas
crushin it at the shack.
Chris got real obsessed with this blog http://fuckyeahawesome.tumblr.com and dude just sat there 24/7 on that shit. You gotta check it out. this is the shit we're into.
we stayed with literally the coolest bros in the universe in Austin. FUCK YES. We chilled. drank. played games. CRUSHED EVERYTHING!

JOBIN
sittin in a trashcan at the burger records showcase.

Got to see my lovely Lindsay
Mean Jeans show at Burger Records showcase killed it
morning party with Jamila from New Oleans. Truly has 1 speed. PARTY. Jamila is busting with tiger blood.
TABOR MAINE
taco time after our show got cancelled.
BIG FUCKING BUG. texASS sized bug.
this image accurately describes this tour:
driving a fat ass drive from austin to la right now. austin treated us well in general except for the 3 out 5 shows that got fucked up, moved, or cancelled. oh well. the 2 we played were BOMB. thanks to everyone who came out/partied/and chilled with us.

2011-03-16T11:35:00.000-07:00

HEY BUTTHEADS! its me, jason! im getting to do the blog post. fuck you chevelle! these are pics from our show at Emo's in austin texass at sxsw (courtesy of austin music weekly's photostream (i guess)). one of them is from pdx pop now last summer taken by Nathan Backous from Jonny X and the Groadies who takes awesome pictures.i just found it.

nowhere TEXAS to NAWLINS to MEMPHIS baby

2011-03-11T18:30:00.000-08:00

This guys real pumped to show you his pussy
we didn't play a show in Austin but we went to Beerland and it was the worst karaoke ever. Like the volume was too loud inside and it was all tremble and stupid.
fuck dallas. dallas 4 eva.
we got trashed and tore up dennys with a dennys coupon. poopon
hotel sweet in austin.
gangsta bunny.
chris can't handle big beans
alligator meat on the roadside.
you may remember my future baby daddy jose guadarrama. he doesn't always look like jimmy neutron.
he once dressed like a space tranny for halloween and i realize that i also dress like a space tranny all the time.
We managed to hit mardi gras on its last night with only 2 hours left to party. So we parked our van on the sidewalk and got super crazy drunk in 10 minutes. danced in the streets. drank dranks. went to some punk show where all the songs were constant breakdowns. ate pizza. I did it with the entire gay community.

mornings after in new orleans are sweet as fuck. hangovers don't exist because new orleans is heaven.

drank our beers while waiting for po boys. chris ate catfish.

when chris moves to new orleans he's going to look just like this. fat and happy.
the lady at the po boy place challenged izak to eat the biggest gnarliest surf and turn po boy. dude killed it quick!

ate by the bayou. this is why we are moving to nola asap.

show in jackson. this is the only pic i took. we partied crazy hard with married southern belles. jason partied their clothes off. I think she partied her own clothes off actually.
it became izaks bday and we got crrraaaazzzyyyy.
big daddy future vision. dog the bounty hunter.
played at odessa in memphis. those kids know how to have a good time! dancing worm style on the floor. freaking out in only good ways.

WENT TO GRACELAND! Finally. I have been waiting too hard.

elvis sure knows how to decorate a room! me & json & izak are gonna do our whole house jungle room style.

this is what my door will look like.
this is what my boyfriend will look like.
this is what my child will look like.

hunka hunka burnin luv in his pants
show some respect

riding in style!

the van is looking better every day!

TUCSON to nowhere TEXAS

2011-03-10T08:45:00.000-08:00

woke up in tucson and hit the ihop. the place to chill on a sunday morning.
just a good ol boy

went to the snake stuff store in new mexico! got fireworks and jason stocked up on rattlesnake tooth earrings.

can you see them?

in las cruces went to a mexican food restaurant and it was acutally good. wtf. like a chevys but not chevys. in the "lounge" there was sky.
at the show all the dudes were walking around with growlers of beer. people know how to drink in las cruces! this guy was walking outside and tapped the side of his beer on the doorway and the bottom just clean fell off and emptied the entire thing. bummer dude!

chris bled all over himself
got pulled over in texas. he had a machine gun and was lookin for mexicans. chris wasnt wearing a seatbelt and had blood all over his shirt and dude didnt notice.
GOT STOPPED BY BORDER PATROL. got taken into the office with like 25 officers and a few mexican dudes who were way bummed. drug dogs took our van & shit apart! chev got her titties and pussy felt up by a butch lady cop. They deported Izak back to mexico cuz the dogs said he smelled mexican. GBW & BOOM AND TEXAS DONT MIX
border patrol gotcha!
american boy

LA 2 TUCSON

2011-03-06T10:36:00.000-08:00

LA to RIVERSIDE

2011-03-05T10:29:00.000-08:00

In LA babies. The titties are out.
poodles
We stayed with our bro Fartsy. I shopped with her on Melrose looking like hookers. Got followed around the stores in our fur vests.

beyonce
this jacket was either 20 bux or 200 bux
the craft at cinefamily
Show at the prospector. We were legit on tv.
Went for taco cart shit the next morning with Fartsy.
While we were there we watched a dog take a shit on the sidewalk and then dude left it! Best game in the world is watching douchebags almost step in shit.
TACOSMEX

We became excedrin addicts. Chris was OFF THE HOOK. Pee pee water on the floor. ALSO I fucking drank Jasons spit by accident. WTF.
We played at the Captains Helm in Costa Mesa CA. FUCKING RADICAL! Show was outside behind the shop. Beautiful weather. Everyone there was underage and too sexy. Well actually mostly the girls and their baby titties. We set up a merch table on the only appropriate thing.
Pee pee water on the floor.
The only way to use our shirts.
Baby puss.
double trouble.
Look at those crazy titties!

everyone was walking on our shirts

stayed at chris' house in Riverside. Slept in the most luxurious bed. Gold satin sheets baby!

little chris! he looks like the boy from the bernie mac show.

I LUV LA OH

2011-03-03T14:32:00.000-08:00

In SF here watching DOG and being more hungover than ever before. Wow blogger is a suckball site. Carls JR in bakersfield
Jason just learned that his phone can take pictures. Some of these are his pix too. NOW WE ARE IN THE SUN IN LA AND DOING IT RIGHT

Scramble with caviar and sour cream

New levels of fucked up
This cat is exactly like a dead cat but its not totally dead.

hooters

how many retards does it take to change a headlight

2011-03-02T11:21:00.000-08:00

beer and fire cheetos 4 bfast

NEW TOUR FUCK BUTTS

2011-03-02T10:53:00.001-08:00

whats up bitches. i'm still drunk writing this bs and it's 11 am. in sf at my bootyful friend adriannes house. party last night? Chris is having beer for bfast. the only way to go. I'm gonna drip dry. So far we've been to sacto and sf and tonight is LA for hanging with fartsy and the gang.

lsdjflds

jldksf

also blogger fucking sucks

GBW & LAZY got home till SMMR BMMR

2010-08-15T15:07:00.000-07:00

ok so maybe this shits a long time coming. we got homo and I am lazy. this post goes back in time a week or two to the time when we were newly back in pdx. Lazy were staying at my house.

On the way to the shell station cole found wine and a box of chocolates! its a date!
this virgo sweat suit was the beginning of the end.

so if you dont wanna get arrested maybe choosing something that's not a tye-dyed virgo sweat suit is a good plan. dude looked rad, but almost went away for life outside of valentines.

broing down?
back to work
twinzies

OK, so maybe I might have posted some party pix. but I want to update the blog a little with pictures of us working on TBA shit. Jason and I went and looked at the space.

we stole sand from sauvie island and are mixing it with paint in order to create the ultimate beach to walk on.
my roots were out of order.
I have a feeling that we're going to spend a lot of time looking like that in Homo Depo.
building a boulder?
floor phaze 1
party zone
trick tipz
smmrbmmr 2010
kathy and the clamz
wet dream!

there must be a better way to upload pictures than this. help me out here.

slctard to homo

2010-08-02T19:05:00.000-07:00

the holograms in twin falls. super super rad!

its really poop

Chicago to SLC FUNK

2010-07-29T02:24:00.001-07:00

stayed at my buddy owens house in chicago. there was definitely a party cat.

shower fluff

in st. louis we played at a weird gallery venue thing with a store upstairs and the venue in the basement. there were lots of terrible zines. so ziney I couldn't touch. Jason found me a weird dirty magazine.

and then our minds were blown hard by the best new band of the world called the fins. straight up instrumental surf band that rocks so hard and no one fucking knows about it. sorry world. you are missing out. ok I just looked and I don't think they even have an internet existence. but I got a tape from them so if you're really my friend I'll make you listen to it.
stayed at one of the fins mansions in the rumpus room.

from here on out the drives are really really eventful. home of arbor day.
oh yeah. the venue fucked up and we drove our asses all the way to omaha to find a dude locking up and telling us that there was never a show. but they are just retarded because then I went and found an email from them confirming that shit. whatevs. everyone in omaha was going to a brooks and dunn concert anyway.
my fave babes
got to kansas city FINALLY.

stayed at a crazy warehouse that would be boring to read me describe but just believe it was crazy rad indescribable.

i smell a new album cover

we are continuing the next few tour dates left with hotties Lazy who we stayed with in KC. they have a more beautiful van and more beautiful faces. LOOK AT THEM. besides, their starting their tour so they will be coming to a city near you asap.
making shirts:
rocking our shit

toss it out the window
gettin super burritos at 3am.

another part of that warehouse that we stayed in. that's the kitchen up there.

catwalk

sludge and babes tour 2010

back in louis and clark zone. this is the worst historical painting i've seen. thumbs up dude!
those tires are big
kansas sure has a weird sense of humor about itself

denver with lust cats of the gutters, night of joy, and lazy. we all wanna have babies with the lust cats.

all 10 of us stayed at a lust cat house. I very drunkenly took a bunch of "hanging out" pictures then just passed out hard.

this is what things look like in wyoming

drive through that shit
i cut my hair in the car.

and then salt lake city.

i knew the place was wack when i saw the graffiti in the girls bathroom. 1st, quote is wrong. 2nd, what the fuck is wind beneath my knees?!
ok so I'm pissed about this salt lake city thing. It was just us, Lazy, and a fuckadelic funky butt band called Hip White Kids (wtf really). Hip White Kids INSISTED they play 2nd because they're a newish band and didn't think many people would see them if they played last. UM, we had all been in salt lake for total of an hour. Isn't this the opposite of what a local band should do? Also, I booked the goddamn show. Those fuckers just got on AS the local band. They don't get to get their way. But the venue was weak so they did get their way. and Shockingly they brought A LOT of people who loooooved funk jamming. We played last and those people had left. I thought the funk retards had left too but actually they were just outside on the patio. and then at the end they took their cut of the money instead of helping out the touring bands. I hope the pizzas they buy with that money makes them shit their pants. Also the sound guy yelled at people but that's besides the point. Hip White Kids can suck my Big White Dick.
waiting for my baby mama after the show to take us to her bountiful mansion.

new york to chicago!

2010-07-24T00:16:00.000-07:00

every single day my screen gets worse.
hangover palace

we met up with mehera and oliver!
MILF
does he look like popeye?

Jason and I watched a good amount of a softball game in a park where every inch of the park was being used for sports of all kinds. The softball teams were split up with about half of each team being orthodox jews and the other dudes all being mostly mexican dudes. I realized that I really think orthodox jews are hot. Like really hot. They were even speaking hebrew. HOT! And before they went up to bat they were smoking cigarettes and getting angry. I could have watched them all night.

went to heavy metal karaoke and jason sung a lot of metallica and misfits
slept in the car outside of meheras in park slope. just me & jaxon. woke up and it smelled like pee because he pissed in a bottle in the car. all the moms walking by with their kids though we were hobo street santa cruz spare change kids with bugs probably.

met back up with babydoll!
everyone has a crush on mehera
lady gaga is old news

sin sin atty. I thought that blonde dude was cute? really?
these punk kids broke their pipe! aww

I took all of these pictures trying to capture the cool photo on this guys license. drunkenly I was sure one would turn out, if not all.

love connection

literally fell asleep like that and then stayed that way ALL NIGHT. Didn't move even a little.

what i had for breakfast

the alright alreadies are so so so good and if you don't check them out you must not like good. hottie karate.

after the show we were rained on harder than I knew rain could rain. walked through puddles that were almost to my knees! but it was warm so it was like a vaycay. tomorrow st louis better not be st lousi.

new orleans to new york

2010-07-21T08:34:00.001-07:00

we haven't had more than a second or two on the internet in a while. I posted these pictures yesterday or something and now I'm going back and trying to write a bit in here. But because we've been moving and shaking so crazy I actually just loaded the blog editor and we're driving right now while I write. But I gotta watch to not use up the computer juice. My screens fucked up in a way that blocks the batt-life spot.

boring boring. anyway. this post represents life from new orleans to new york. as I write this we're driving from cleveland to chicago. I've gotta type without looking because I'll get car sick.

new orleans: we didn't end up going in this amazing looking shop and I will regret that every single day.

I don't know if you can really tell in the picture, but in the back left corner of the shop there's a weird dino-cat skeleton with its arm raised.
this was us
really cool fake food art hanging outside an art gallery on magazine.

jason and I went to an antique shop and spent a long long time in there. we didn't even get halfway through the shop before we had to leave because they were closing.

we went to this rad chick Sonali's house around the french quarter. it was the most fucking amazing house I've ever seen in my life. It kind of ruined my life so I won't go into too much detail because it could really ruin anyones life. There were cool cats hanging out there making us bomb tacos with a billion topping choices and good music was being played and we were happy.

backyard:

hang in there baby!

current bf/future hubby/baby daddy-o

and then we played with the fucking unnaturals! it's rad to play a show with a band that we'd absolutely go see live no matter what. we played with them and the dives at creepyfest at the circle bar and it was maybe one of the best shows of tour so far.
there was a nerdy guy who was really into it. he had a crazy hot gf and a gator puppet that he was making swim and dance while the unnaturals played. I'm so glad that didn't happen during our set.
jose hooked us up

in the morning we went and got bbq and it was the beginning of the end

last we saw of that shirt. jason left it in memphis.

you got it!
and the show in memphis was so fun! we played at the dairy (house show) with bake sale who KILLED IT. I love bake sale. If I were actually ON the web right now I'd attach a video of them. They threw pastries. I'm pretty sure James would have a crush on all of them.

Jason tried to grab a cicada outside and it was squishy and wouldnt let go of the wall. Like, it would have let it's legs get ripped off before letting us pick him up.

they memphis show was amazing amazing and i've never sweat more in my life. like wetter than if i were swimming because the wet was coming out of my skin and wouldnt stop. i was a dripping sponge. there was nothing to do about it. no where to wipe off. i'd love to see pictures from that show because we probably looked crazy. on this tour I've learned that I sweat a lot from my top lip. Which is VERY unattractive. like a liquid moustache.

oh yeah. and that fucking bbq was the beginning of the end because we let it sit in the car all day and then drunkenly after the show it seemed like a good idea for jason to eat the pulled pork. next morning barfing, food poisoning, death. that was a bad day. had to miss graceland.
but we did pull it together enough to get to loretta lynns kitchen

mooney

$6 chap sticks. one says 50s elvis and the other says 60s elvis. !!!!!!

it was really hard not to spend a billion dollars there because i love loretta lynn about equal to elvis.
god, and then we got to nashville to play at bettys grill. was a wacky town. we got there early and devin and i went in and made love with the locals while jason shivered and vomited on himself in the car. an old man named Jimbo told me "you know, in Ireland 'spunk' is what they call MAN JUICE" and then walked away. A old sausage-y leathery man named Gene freaked us all out. If I had interenet right now I'd be looking this up, and I suggest you do, but Gene told me that 1st he went to vietnam. got injureed. came back and worked for the government. I said, what did you do? I expected him to say post office or some shit and he said sniper. he told me that people think he's a bastard because he's killed soo many people. whatevz, i said. then he retired from sniping and was a PROFESSIONAL WRESTLER named the viking. Look this shit up. He was very good and famous he said. Got his ass kicked every night. Then he got a brain an-ur-izm and had to quit wrestling because they cut his signature long hair in surgery. THEN he wrote country songs. 2 number 1 hits. "I Got You" for Dwight Yoakam and "Who You Gonna Blame This Time" for Vern Gosden. This was all in 83. Seriously, look this up. Who's got the writing credit for that shit?

here's bettys:

then to beautiful historic knoxville where we got to spend time with the sexy babies lisa and ryland. they live in the woods overlooking condos with a pool.

our van wouldn't start so ryland helped us get all our equipment to the venue in that cute little baby car. then we hung out at the place till the show started. some dudes came in who were walking around knoxville trying to set up shows for their band. were shocked that we had booked our tour using email! they were driving to every city and walking in!

next morning tow. the driving was craycray. chewing tobaccy.
he said there was only enough room for one of us in the cab of the tow truck so jason and i got to ride IN the van while we were being towed. is this legal? it was great. like being in a parade. people we drove by were cheering for us. seriously.

wack
nothing was wrong with the car. wtf.

so we went to the mall.
this nerd
through mountains
ohyeah, and then I got food poisoning from cracker barrel or something and puked in a mcdonalds bathroom. that day was a blur. we cancelled greensbore.
stopped at a shop that supplies churches with music shit so i could buy a power adaptor.

jason showing me what it looks like to smell a 5 year olds balls. the little penis would flop on his nose.

BALTIMORE

Young Jaguars are fucking amazing. check them out.

If James is as good at stalking as he says, then we went to John Waters house and left him presents in a pizza box. We left them for someone.

philly: cheesesteak

picked up matt palladinosaur
this is honestly my favorite painting in the entire world: my kind of art.

and to NYC
I got an amazing dinner with my amazing beautiful friend Set. She's my oldest friend in the world.

firing people
jimmy kimmel was in the cab. we had 4 in the back and 1 in the front and it was the craziest cab drive of my life. yeah, I never go to nyc and I'm sure that's normal, but it was like grand theft auto in real life.

hangover

fuckd up non stop

2010-07-14T09:28:00.000-07:00

so I'm pretty sure that if I lived in New Orleans it'd be a horrible idea. I would be drunk all day and never realize when to stop. I'd just pass out in the bar at 4 am. Everyone is incredibly nice, shockingly nice. Everywhere we go people are chatting us up and genuinely rad and interested in chatting us up. It's bad, because I just want to party all the time with everyone and if I lived here I'd never get 1 thing done.
ice cream garbage ! makes me wanna eat trash. junk food! haha very funny

we used my food stamps for buy enough food for every rad person ever and had a feast.
jose looks like a mexican greaser on safari. ethnic summer. tropical future.

he has a bucket of worms in his kitchen.

gaybf
gaygf

we went to the french quarter to consign some records and ended up walking around most of the day. I got a fucking pina colada at this neat alcoholic slurpee bonanza and it came in a to-go cup and i walked around the street drinking it. so sweet that I kinda just wanted to barf, but then i got drunker and stopped caring.
in the tropical future gators will fly and muskrats will travel in canoes.
canoes filled with gator heads
young hot translates in every language

we went to peaches records and consigned 10 recs. they we so fucking nice! next time we're in town we're planning an in-store performance. the place is super legit, like a tower records or something, except its family operated and the owner was actually there. like mom&pop shop mixed with big biz.
sassy!
just focus on the legs
everything in new orleans just reminds me of the haunted mansion in disneyland.
poo boy
jason is supposed to be making a nature blog, so I'm not really supposed to be posting these pics. he's catching frogs like crazy! this is maybe frog number 5 on tour so far.

i found this dude laying in the doorway to the patio passed out and like 8pm at the saint. he tried to push me in the mens room! then he was crazy and laughing at everything and it didnt make sense until the bartender told us he was on mushrooms.

jason and the bartender doing a ballad version of breaking up is hard to do

after party!

a little dust on the bottle

2010-07-12T10:08:00.000-07:00

updating here in New Orleans. Haven't even been here more than a day and I'm pretty sure I'm going to move here. Everything looks like it's straight out of disneyland but REAL (what I've always wanted) and everyone is so fucking friendly.
buuuuttttttt, we just got down with our 2 biggest stupidest drives of them all. CROZZING TEXXX-ASS! The drive from Phoenix to Austin was suck city USA. And by suck city I mean NO city, because shit was just dead zone.
this was cool:except for this house in the background with these dogs in the yard.

jason pulled me out of the car to go into this gas station to look at the punk poo.
mmm
monsoons!
little baby texas towns that we passed through...

I shoulda learned to rope and ride
wearing my six shooter riding my pony and a cattle drive
for some reason this made me laugh so hard that tears were pouring down my face
we got a last last last sec show at cheer up charlies. since stupid ugly las cruces fucked us we tried to salvage a friday and at least play somewhere, anywhere! so we played at charlies in austin at around 7. happy hour show! it was fun. although we only played for the bartender and a guy who kept yelling out requests. that's actually not true, there were lots of rad sexy babies outside listening.
we stayed with SUPER COOL D00D Wyatt. Lives in a beauty of a house.
nature blog preview. lizard huntin
the tail fell off

I screamed and almost barfed:
DO YOU SEE THAT ALIEN SHIT?

TMI
she smells like shampoo
a lafayette radio station was playing country from the 80s and 90s so jpow called in and requested a song. got hooked up.

pulled off for a sec in baton rouge

o
i
black hole sunthank god for swamps

i ate the best nachos i've ever had in my life
staying with my future baby daddy, sexy husband Jose. He put this tramp in his place.
no pain no gain

bug bite tattys
then he showed us ultimate fighting porn

we'll have beautiful children
we are kind of just flipping our shit constantly over new orleans.
met this rad guy in an amazing coffee shop. best cold brew i've ever had. he was really nice and talked to us for a while.

princess

i am a leper
this shit is getting worse
FLYER BABY

we're about to go do a radio show at tulane univ!

king of the hill

2010-07-08T22:28:00.000-07:00

in tucson! stayed with the wonderful and beautiful Patsy Gelb. We got there on the 4th of July and watched fireworks on the roof of some crazy building. I guess every year they do fireworks and this mountain in Tucson catches fire. GREAT! Also, fyi http://youneedcollege.com has the best commercials. I'm in El Paso writing this right now and it's blowing my mind. Almost as much as Patsys barracuda blew my wad.

girl took us on some joy rides in the heat. If you're the passenger in her car you gotta be the ac too.

some town between tucson and phoenix!
angels
ok, we get to phoenix and arrive at the show. but we're also starving. the guy who set the show up recommended that we drive about a mile or two away for food to this weird ass block where everything looks completely residential and suburban, but each house is NOT a house, they're actually fucking restaurants. We went into the one he suggested, only after careful inspection because this shit looked JUST like houses and I really thought we were going to get the cops called on us for walking straight into someones living room.
but inside they looked legit

we went to a bar next to the show that was referred to as the oldest tiki bar ever or something completely unbelieveable. it sucked balls.
The show was awkward. I guess Monday night isn't the night for phoenix. No one really came. But Jasons little bro did and that was great. We stayed at his dads RANCH for the night. Lots of crazy shit boiling in the sun. Excer-size equipment.

this is what everything looked like outside
the powells:

how do these rocks do this shit? how do they get this way?
we took a few days off to go camping up by Payson AZ. Stopped at a taco place and found this picture inside.
Then to walmart. These dudes are ready to party.

need:
Jasons dad taught us fish fry secrets

soda rollz
jason started the fire

afterward, crawdad catching

our castle

then I got a text message that looked like this:
shitty kitty:

MONSOOOOON
the drive from Mesa to El Paso looked like this
guess where we stopped

found an old cowboy in his sweet ride
snake tooth earring

GOT A HOTEL ROOM BITCHZZZZZZ
and watched the late show which i haven't seen since I was like 13. Jack Hanna was on and that was grrrreat.

guantanamo baywatch blog post title

2010-07-05T12:31:00.000-07:00

how the hell can people still be sleeping?!Obviously, some shit went down on my computer and now it's quickly spreading. And traveling through the heat, moving it everyday won't help at all. But on the plus side, it can look really cool:
Show in Pasadena was cancelled because people are motherfuckers. It took us 3 hours of getting lost to figure it out. Then we went back to LA and got 2 pizzas. You know you can order pizza online at domino's and the tell you who makes it? You get a virtual pizza image! Interactive! Lopez made ours and delivered it to our stomachs.

4th of july

driving through death valley, i think

patsy's famz house in tucson. I slept in the princess room.

TRUCK ON!

2010-07-03T23:38:00.000-07:00

In Oakland, staying with Cody Clams. Nice enough to let me and Cole do some hottie tattiezzz. Here's Jason laying down the plans:REALLY laying down the plans
My awesome handiwork. Also touched up that teardrop. BLOOD PARADISE
the rag was white, but now it's covered in his blood and ink.

getting some keys copied.

we played the next day (or maybe it was that day) at Bucky's Cocktail Loung in San Mateo. The most AMAZING place. There are only like 5 guys in there, all over 50 and nearly passed out. Suuuper dark bar. We walk in and ask the first guy behind the counter if he's Peanut (the name of the dude who we spoke to when setting up the show) and he barely looked at us and said "no. and never call me that again." We ended up making literally NO money, my brother and his friends didn't even buy anything! But the show was amazing fun. This place has a stage that is LEGIT, disco ball, great lighting.. I hope people get the clue and start playing there.
This picture was among millions in an entire wall collage of the regulars:

Played with Moira Scar again. LOVE THEM. Before the show me and Lulu were sitting outside by her car and a crazy old dude wobbled up and started yammering at us for a while, then he told us it was his birthday, but that if we told anyone he'd pull his gun out of his pocket and shoot us both in the leg, then he'd run to his car and grab his hatchet and chop us up.

Little Coleys bday

Went to Santa Cruz again because we can't get enough of it.
first, Corey Feldmans band Truth Movement performed on the Beach Boardwalk. second, they played Lost Boys. yes please!
drank so fucking much. about two 40s each, and then some. wtf. drinking thru the marlboro towel so we don't get in trouble.
party at lisas moms. too wild for me. I barfed in the toilet. redvines from around 8 pm!
this is really how he dances, not a staged picture

paradise

the drive down to la
we stopped by rainbo records to pick up our fucking vinyl! there were complications but whatev

true paradise

laguna beach! it was so weird. everyone was young and hot or even old and hot, but you could only tell they were old because their kids were like 12 themselves. we played at trashpretty vintage and it was really rad. i'd definitely recommend it.
TRMRS is one of the best bands in the world. I dream of playing with them again.
kids these days!
laguna beach is full of magic crystals.

san diego. played at tower bar. place thought it was tough but everyone was a pusspuss. they pay 5 bucks to see a show and don't even clap between songs? we thought they hated us, so I mooned everyone. but people like being mooned so i got lots of butt compliments. actually we got quite a few compliments, so people maaayyyybe liked it, but played hard to get.

OMG THE FUCKING TAR PITS! I'd been waiting for whole life for this moment.
and it ruled!

bubbling crude
we were scared of it at first but I eventually licked some.

it seems like tar just busts out of the ground whenever it feels like it
see, it's us and a sabertooth tiger skeleton.
god, I wish we had more time in the museum. I took as many pictures as possible but needed another hour probably.

after we were on our way to melrose and found this amazing prop store, or something. it was my dreams come true. when I'm rich I'm hiring these people to furnish my surroundings.

there were some hot titz on melrose

but doodz were totally fucked up
I talked jason into getting his ear pierced. in this pic, notice the action:
penetration:

moist women and moist men. the logo for moist women has sexy lips. the logo for moist men has sexy lips with drips flying off of them.

man hand dick show, pokeland, sack-ramen-blow, panty booze, monstergay

2010-06-28T18:37:00.000-07:00

getting to the show
foiled
the shivas
after the show we had to wait around the tenderloin for a few hours until the person we were gonna stay with got into town. we went into this lame bar that only looked cool. this was the best part:
JAXON STOMP TINY PALM TREE!!
writin' some new songs

sf is bummy
shannon and the clams in sacramento:
RAD

no time for siesta, now it's time for fun
toe job
soul sukka
down to earth
santa cruz beach boardwalk babezxxx!!

shannon & the clams hunk hunt video shoot

cool beer cozy

then we met up with kimberly! she's super fun
junk shakin hunk

s&tc at Joses Lounge Underground in Monterey

landfill park in oakland

ying yang infinity sex
someone made me a sandwich with a hotdog wrapped in bacon covered in mustard and grilled onions
moira scar

flat burrito dong

inquisitive minds wanna know...
we tried to go see John Waters art show on Geary but happened to show up on the 1 day it was closed.
cool pizza paddy
cool pizza daddy

peewee pizza

it heightens the climax

2010-06-23T11:11:00.001-07:00

Doing so bad at blooging. Hocking a bloogy. Hanging at my dads house watching America's Got Talent. A large woman named Sponge-etta is about to sing. The weather is a beautiful 75-80 degrees. We've only played 2 shows so far, but have managed to do a lotlot of chilling. Also Cole (Miller) came with us for the drive down to the bay area which means we got extra fun and extra little dogs.

this is a napkin representation of his dog

First show was in Eugene at the Wandering Goat Cafe. I expected a whole lotta lame from a cafe show, but it was rad. I didn't end up taking pictures. The cafe was really nice and gave us a fucking OPEN tab for anything. Coffee, pastries, soup, beer, whatever we wanted and MORE. People actually SHOWED up, which I wasn't expecting either. We made a little money money sold a few tapes.

Next day we boogies to Arcata/Eureka CA. The drive was super fun and heightened our climax when we ENTERED the golden state.
California here we come, right back where we started from. (just me and cole)

EUREKA potluck before the show
really excited about being in california, but it was actually freezing. I only packed sandals and mostly shorts, tanks, and bathing suits. We looked like a bunch of pussy looozers who should have been able to handle it because we just came from rainland.

nipslip, dead dog
held our breath through the whole bridge, except I took a tiny breath in the middle.
la azteca in redwood city!

Rodin sculptures cupping balls.
can't resist the gates of hell
and then we went to antonios nut house and it was FUCKING LAME. PBR for $3? No. Its cool, peanuts on the floor and all. But you're not a dive bar when everyone hanging out there works at a software company or Google or is a Stanford Student. And more gorillas please:

FRI-CHEE-LING found!

2010-06-06T12:04:00.000-07:00